Across the Atlantic living in a small suburb of Napoli lives distant cousins. I last saw them when I was about four years old during their trip to NYC. I would have been burned at the stake if I went to Italy without visiting them. One of my uncles was still in touch with the cousins and connected me with them over email. They were really excited to have their American cousin come over...
But my immediate family in NY was a little worried that my Italian cousins' enthusiasm was just a facade. The reason being that a certain wing of my family with whom we have had a good ol' Italian family feud had made it their business to spin nasty tales about myself and my family. They spread these to virtually anyone who would listen. The rumors are usually far from reality and often humorous. The last I heard I was knocked up and married to a women in San Francisco. (marriage? puke!). Not that there is anything wrong with any of these things (well...), but it is simply not true. The evil spinsters told it to people they knew would be horrified, including everyone in my conservative neighborhood and everyone who still bothers with them in my family. When I went to Napoli I was not sure what my cousins thought of me.
As soon as I arrived at my cousins house I saw that my fears were completely unfounded. My distant cousins were warm and welcoming and planned a fantastic few days in Napoli for me.
From little comments throughout the week I came to know that they did indeed hear the rumors from across the pond, but that they disregarded them because any good person knows that he who throws stones...One cousin pointed out, "Family is family. It doesn't matter how long or far we have been away from each other once we are together it is like we saw each other yesterday." My family in the US (the non-feud ones excluded) are also loyal in this way. I see where it comes from.
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Everyone I met in Italy just loves. Intensely and passionately. The fact that Napoli sits at the base of the volcano I thought made this characteristic acute. Whether is was talking about the garbage problem (Napoli: famous for sun, sea and garbage) or crime problem Napolitans love or love to hate with zeal. You can find them with that passion in the most surprising places...namely in cars along every major vista. My cousin called them "love zones". This is where anyone with a car and without a place for lov'in with their hunny parks. The windows of these cars are fogged over and covered with a sheet and/or newspaper. And it is not just your average teenage make-out zone. Oh no! From awkward teenagers to twenty somethings to married love affairs to sex workers... this is where you come to consummate any sort of relationship not able to be carried out in a hetereo-normative household. The city might be conservative in the way its citizens publicly live their lives but privately it seemed to me they let their zest for life and love be subject to no bounds. Although publicly those very same people might denounce homosexuality or premarital sex, privately they give into what they want most. And with a car and a sheet you can drive to any love zone in Napoli to make that happen.
But my immediate family in NY was a little worried that my Italian cousins' enthusiasm was just a facade. The reason being that a certain wing of my family with whom we have had a good ol' Italian family feud had made it their business to spin nasty tales about myself and my family. They spread these to virtually anyone who would listen. The rumors are usually far from reality and often humorous. The last I heard I was knocked up and married to a women in San Francisco. (marriage? puke!). Not that there is anything wrong with any of these things (well...), but it is simply not true. The evil spinsters told it to people they knew would be horrified, including everyone in my conservative neighborhood and everyone who still bothers with them in my family. When I went to Napoli I was not sure what my cousins thought of me.
As soon as I arrived at my cousins house I saw that my fears were completely unfounded. My distant cousins were warm and welcoming and planned a fantastic few days in Napoli for me.
From little comments throughout the week I came to know that they did indeed hear the rumors from across the pond, but that they disregarded them because any good person knows that he who throws stones...One cousin pointed out, "Family is family. It doesn't matter how long or far we have been away from each other once we are together it is like we saw each other yesterday." My family in the US (the non-feud ones excluded) are also loyal in this way. I see where it comes from.
_________________________________________________________________
Everyone I met in Italy just loves. Intensely and passionately. The fact that Napoli sits at the base of the volcano I thought made this characteristic acute. Whether is was talking about the garbage problem (Napoli: famous for sun, sea and garbage) or crime problem Napolitans love or love to hate with zeal. You can find them with that passion in the most surprising places...namely in cars along every major vista. My cousin called them "love zones". This is where anyone with a car and without a place for lov'in with their hunny parks. The windows of these cars are fogged over and covered with a sheet and/or newspaper. And it is not just your average teenage make-out zone. Oh no! From awkward teenagers to twenty somethings to married love affairs to sex workers... this is where you come to consummate any sort of relationship not able to be carried out in a hetereo-normative household. The city might be conservative in the way its citizens publicly live their lives but privately it seemed to me they let their zest for life and love be subject to no bounds. Although publicly those very same people might denounce homosexuality or premarital sex, privately they give into what they want most. And with a car and a sheet you can drive to any love zone in Napoli to make that happen.
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